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Easy Answears [Apr. 28th, 2006|01:45 am]
So after all this time of my emotional turmoil, he finally experiances what I have been going through nigh endlessly on fucking loop. Congratulations. Guess when it's your turn to be distraught and sad as hell she'll happily oblige being your one and only... What a sick little world this is. But had we any doubts, we would proceed no further right? YOu who understand nothing past your own lies should be shut away from those foolish enough to care. I have only regret for my own ignorance in believing your will to make a choice. Rot in heaven.
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LOGO!!! [Feb. 17th, 2006|07:44 pm]
Um... I'm working on my logo now... Picture in time... it's neat... in my mind... for now... TADA!!!...
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Wolf Mangler [Feb. 11th, 2006|01:28 am]
[Numbly-ish feeling, sorta like I'm |coldfrostbitten]

Yessir... my new userpic is the logo for wolfmangler... go look them up yourself. I am cold. Sleeping by myself on the couch. Left here. Alone. Again. And yet there's a part of my brain that says this is unexpected. Then there's the part that's not stupid. And should have seen this coming, a mile away. Burn. All of you. And feel how cold it can be to turn to ashes.
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NOthing to type [Feb. 6th, 2006|11:59 pm]
No really... um... I don't have anything to talk about right now..... OH YEAH. I ate some food today. That was good.
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Tearz [Feb. 1st, 2006|11:46 pm]
I will wait for you. Through all the doubt and expectations of your abscence. From your mouth, and from my mind. I will wait as I always have... too foolish to ever come in from the rain. And to blind to see anyone poised to send me ready and easily seen dissapointment. But truly I see it all. I just hold fast to my sword by the blade, hoping they will see the blood. And maybe once... just fucking once... they will change their mind.

I looked through my old wedding pictures today. I thought I surely would cry. But I didn't. I started to, but then I felt a hollowness. Like my mind is telling me she is gone forever, and that would be fine, if I could stop getting the flood of images... the sound of her voice,and the wrenching in my gut. The feeling of someone, carving you up into something like an idol of what together you where. But there is no us, beyond what I hold in memories. But why cling to those ideas? Am I afraid she's the only one who would have never left me, who would always be there when no one else would be... Who was someone I would spend the rest of life with, in happiness, where I a stronger man? I don't know. I just hope someone proves me wrong. "I shouldn't wait for you"? No. I think waiting for you, is the last thing I can hold faith to anymore. She has taken my son. I have lost more within and more without than anyone outside of me can fathom. So I will hold onto this one thing. And pray.
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seriously, I think Necro And varg... [Feb. 1st, 2006|12:40 pm]
should be fused into one person. Now that. Would be fucking brute. HahahhA. This is a silly silly thought. But imagine Burzum + Necro....... muahahahahaha!
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Song to the Siren [Jan. 31st, 2006|12:46 pm]
... I dreamt about my wife... She looked like she did our wedding day. I don't want to write about this.
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(no subject) [Jan. 31st, 2006|01:43 am]
My new tattoo is itchy. Whatever. I found some good images for use in my project. They are secret. So instead I'll just post a post about nothing. Liz is moving out... hmmm. I have mixed feelings. I read an interview with Malefic from Xasthur. He sounds like someone I would like to meet. I agree with his opinions on the afterlife... I wish things would just be quiet. That's what goes through my mind a lot. Which is funny because Black Metal is like a drug for me, and it's often... not... um, quiet. But now when I hear it, and I hear it a lot, past all the lyrics, past all the odinism and hate, for me at it's core... This music is a prayer for silence. The Knight of Swords project has a new drive. An old drive. And its teeth are clenched around the throat of the oracle. It will speak no more, and I will become the voice of my own fate even if it ends in fire and pain. Because it will be mine. Bleh. I miss my Lizzo. And more than that... I miss my son. Valhalla you FUCKS!
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Waltz (Faeries aire and death waltz 31st movement) Op. 563 [Jan. 23rd, 2006|04:07 am]
*begin by singing the theme to your deflowering backwards in natural harmonics, with a ragtime feel*
*cue strings, all instruments tuned a half step down from the one to the left of closest outy belly button*
*wait for drum roll...*
*.... and release the penguins*
*after 30 minute progressive jazz experimental tuba solo move trombones down stage*
*begin main waltz theme based on a cro-magnon skinning chant*
*insert arpeggios using allen wrench*
*turn off flamethrower at this point*
*then. when it starts to get weired, woman dressed in duck suit to symbolize world peace sings -

and it goes...

Her skin is like the space between your scars
And she scars like a sculpture
Dilemmas are just a momentary diversion
Turn around and you'll be followed home
By your back
And on your feet

*light fuse*
*begain interpretive dance*
*remove santa hat from paper mache fidel castro*
*bow towards left side of stage and make pre-written statement about the socio-economical unrest in a third world nation with less than 2 vowels*
*as cannons fire have midgets descend with the curtain between their teeth*
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Knight of Swords - Blood Poison [Jan. 20th, 2006|08:36 am]
[Numbly-ish feeling, sorta like I'm |GRIM AND FROSTBITTEN]
[Die. |Crebain - Cries of my mother]

Blood poison
Armies of culture
Blood poison
All poised with rifles empty

Why do they sound off these anthems?
And celebrate their history as if they where living it?
Here I see no great conquerers
Across the land I see nothing but those
Who cling to echos and icons
When will their ancestry be seen for the reality
It is spoiled
In this cesspool of idealism

Blood poison
I will show you true embracing
Blood poison
Of the rage centuries old
Blood poison
Someone with me will you stand?!
And stop the bleeding of this earth
The human trash is now at the brink
Of turning our destiny
In to a sewer of blood poisoning

Blood poison
Now it's death or ascension
Blood poison
No one can save you from your own dilution...
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